On fear

After my most recent attempt, I went to the New York Public Library, the library at the New York Psychiatric Institute and local bookstores and did a lot of reading. I was following certain lines of thought, which will be explored here in time, and I filed all sorts of comments away.

Most of these relate to the way we tend to see suicide with fear.

“There are few if any individuals to whom the idea of suicide has never occurred.”

– Erwin Stengel in the journal Suicide and Attempted Suicide

“It is logical to expect that a better understanding of how and why man destroys himself would prove of the utmost practical importance. … Surely no other mysterious phenomenon of human activity has excited so little scientific investigation.”

– Karl Menninger

“We are so phobic about suicide that we fear even knowing about it.”

– Thomas Szasz, “The Medicalization of Everyday Life”

“When we avoid human problems that are elusive or complex, irrational or subterranean, we tend to close our hearts. … We not only become more distanced from aspects of other people’s lives that we don’t understand, but reject those parts of our own lives as well.”

– Richard Heckler, “Waking up Alive” (interviews with survivors of suicide attempts)

“We seem to separate ourselves from the subject of self-murder in the same way that the suicide feels himself separated from the rest of us when he contemplates the fate he is about to choose. Alienated and alone, he is drawn to the grave because there seems no other place to go.”

– Sherwin Nuland, “How We Die”

“The reality of suicide is not fine and pure and philosophical, but messy and appalling and physical.”

– Andrew Solomon, “The Noonday Demon”

“Death’s edge is so abrupt and near that many people who expect a short and momentary dive may be astounded to find that it is bottomless and change their minds and start to scream when they are only halfway down.”

– Edward Hoagland, “Heaven and Nature”

“am I afraid the exotic act will make me blunder …”

Robert Lowell in the poem “Suicide:”

3 thoughts on “On fear

  1. What about FEAR of being so called NORMAL or getting ‘fixed’ as my sister and daughter always imply that i need to do

  2. I agree with Richard Heckler’s quote. I feel very rejected by people who don’t understand suicidal feelings and thoughts. A lot of people reject me when I open up about how I really feel – at times I feel like hurting myself because I’m so scared. But then after hearing what I say , they don’t want to talk to me or even associate with me. It’s hard when people are only nice to me when I’m happy and avoid me when I’m not. That’s sad because when I’m sad, that’s when I need people the most. I hope I don’t do that to others and I want to help others like me.
    I realize that people who do reject me also reject a part of themselves as well. They are not willing to accept a part of who they are – I feel like they try to hide it and push it away. As a result, they avoid people who remind them of that nasty part of themselves. This only makes the problem much worse.
    Being depressed and suicidal is such a taboo because there’s a lot of stigma attached to being “different ” and have “mental issues”. I must admit that it took a really long time to express my feelings of suicide because I was afraid of rejection and I didn’t want to end up in a psych ward. There’s so many bad things about it in media and I didn’t want to be like those people in media. They’re portrayed as demonic, murderous, cold people who don’t have proper judgment. I feel like the news and magazine only focus on how mentally ill people harm others. But the media doesn’t portray people with mental issues so similar to ” normal” people. That’s why people in society will not share openly about their struggles – and as a result of their secrets and shame, their emotional health is compromised. This can lead to very dangerous consequences. We will not be able prevent suicide from happening if we don’t talk about it. We are as sick as our secrets.

  3. The consciousness that Fear is underlies all mental health issues. As an ex Registered Nurse and now self employed spiritual / energetic teacher,mentor, and living practitioner / consultant I am frequently assisting many through their journey of what I prefer to call their ‘spiritual crisis or moment in time’. I currently am walking this path with one of my daughters also.I prefer the term spiritual crisis simply because that’s how I now see it to be, and not getting bogged in the rhetoric that there is a physical mental health issue or disease element. Fear is not tangible although our perception is one in the moment of being extremely real and threatening. on a personal level and now through my teaching understanding the basic concepts of energy and vibrations assists one to grasp and run with tangible and concepts that promote hope healing and ultimate energetic balance. Energy in its quantum state is completely neutral but all energy has the potential to create a positive or a negative energetic state according to its momentum and eventual critical mass threshold which ultimately gives birth to the perception of the perceived outcome or reality ie; the yin/ yang, and in this scenario Fear and Love. Where fear is love is not because energetically they exist on very different frequencies waveforms and patterns. Its like AM and FM stereo the two will not match in any way nor can they co-exist in the same moment of thought or time. Through much personal experience and now with the wondrous beings around me who seek my counsel, those moments of despair, anxiousness and overwhelm we witness and deeply feel are in fact energetic frequential moments for incredible growth and change – we just haven’t been educated or programmed to such, quite the contrary I’m afraid. The incredible beings who experience visual and auditory ‘extra sensory’ stimuli are simply tuning into a different radio station so to speak. This truly is quantum physics and multidimensional consciousness energy principles of understanding, but trying to address a multidimensional issue through 3D eyes and consciousness is where the systems have failed and continue to question any other possibilities. Listening to a Shaman’s understanding and perception of ‘mental crises’ moments is eye opening. There are so many layers in the un-ravelling process of past and current programmed information in this area, but it is most definately underway. We in the clinical fields have spoken of holistic care and models of care for many years. It has in no way ever been addressed. To truly make ‘headway’ – excuse the pun we must be incorporating a model that truly addresses body mind and the spirit. The latter in accordance to each individuals needs and belief systems.
    Our thoughts are indeed our power and are most powerful as they are what creates our reality.
    We are the writer director and producer of our life by our thoughts conscious but most importantly subconsciously and unconsciously. A s we come to understand, accept and take back our power and responsibility for us then great changes and miracles abound within and without of us. It is only and always about the journey and not the destination.

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